Ugg boots and Melton Mowbray

As Mandy was looking for a new watch I was aware that Oasis in Covent Garden smelt of farts, it was then that I saw someone buying what can only be described as utterly ridiculous footwear.

Enter the Ugg boots.

If you were doing a GCSE in Fashion & Footwear Design and you had the Easter term and £6.50 for materials to create an item of clothing, it is likely that the outcome would resemble the Ugg boot. Remember the Pixie boots in the eighties? Again, bloody ridiculous! However women always seem to carry the fashion thing off, irrespective of the practicality or price or whatever.

I used to know this bloke called Hughes from Melton Mowbray who was into Bros when that whole thing was going off in the late 80s. At 16 I considered myself, and those around me, to be young men. I at least expected us all to try and behave as such what with it being the Army and everything.

Imagine my shock when in the communal showers during the first week some ginger haired bloke from the midlands started singing “I-owe-you-othing – Oh err!”.
There he was, covered in foaming Insignia prancing about like something off Stars in their Eyes.

Actually quite embarrassing.

The first time I clocked him in civilian clothes finished it off, he was wearing those enormous chunky polished shoes made famous by Lisa Stansfield, and on each shoe was attached two Grolsh bottle tops that would chink together like shackles as he walked along, ridiculous.